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I can hardly believe this time has come. Being over 11 years in the making, the dream of publishing my memoir IS A REALITY!!!!

Silent Warrior - Transformation

Paperback available for New Zealand and Australia direct from me

Paperback on Amazon

E-book on Amazon

So, what's this book about? LIFE. A life that didn't go according to 'plan'. But a life that transformed me in ways I couldn't begin to imagine. 

Here's the back cover summary:

We all have a Silent Warrior inside. It’s the part of you that keeps going when times get tough.

As a woman in her 20s, Paula was living a conventional life, busy creating a strong financial foundation with her husband before starting a family. However, at age 28, a fated moment sent her world into turmoil. Sneaking up silently and without warning, she soon learned that what she thought was solid and true, was in fact, not. The emotional fallout that followed became the catalyst that sent her body into premature menopause.

By 30, Paula was post-menopausal, separated from her husband, and weathering the storms of depression. How did she turn her life around? By developing her Silent Warrior.

In Silent Warrior – Transformation, Paula reveals her journey of body, mind, and spirit as she courageously navigates a life of synchronicity and life-changing experiences that influence not only her life, but the lives of others.

From her shocking diagnosis, the twisting pathways of loss and grief, to deep love and transformation, Paula’s journey will inspire you and show you that by following your heart, and developing a Silent Warrior spirit, you too can overcome life’s challenges, and watch magic unfold.

And here's the beginning of chapter 1:


Unseen in the background, fate was quietly slipping lead into the boxing glove.

P.G. Wodehouse


New Zealand – December 2011


Dear Yogi,

     I’m a firm believer in fate. In something bigger than ourselves that guides our lives to meet certain people at certain times, forging experiences to lead us to our destiny. I believe with all my heart; we were destined to meet. To become such an intricate part of each other’s being that we could perceive life no other way.

     How is it, a childless 46-year-old woman from New Zealand could meet and come to love so deeply an 11-year-old boy from a small fishing village in Bali? I can’t logically explain fate or destiny, but I can explain the journey that led me to you.

     When my life fell apart — newly separated, depressed, and post-menopausal at age 30, I had no inkling of the incredible voyage of discovery to come.

     My diagnosis of premature ovarian failure (POF) at 29, just one year earlier, was a shock, to say the least. You may wonder what the big deal is — it’s only menopause, a natural part of a woman’s bodily changes. And yes, that’s true, but not when it happens 20 years earlier than it should. It is very much a life-changer on many levels.

     Premature menopause was my catalyst. Death, growth, and transformation are the journey I took to you. Let’s begin…


The tourniquet tightened around my upper arm. I flinched slightly as the sting of the needle entered the crease of my left elbow where my most prominent vein lay. While my blood was being drawn, I wondered how many others would sit in this chair today, in a quest to solve the mysteries of their body. Three vials of dark ruby liquid later and, with a wad of cotton wool taped into the crook of my arm, I was back in reception to wait… wait… wait. Alone, and the odd one out amidst women in various stages of pregnancy scattered around the waiting room, I reached for an outdated magazine from the pile perched on the glass and chrome coffee table, thinking, ‘Damn you, Luke McAlister, I’m here because of you, while you’re at home playing happy families. You bastard, I curse the day you walked back into my life.’

     Snapping to attention as my name was called, I followed the nurse down a long corridor, passing closed doors to hidden rooms on either side, until we arrived at the consulting room of the specialist gynaecologist I was there to see.

     I lowered myself into the chair opposite him. The knots in my stomach tightened as my heart increased its anxious beat in my chest. I held my breath. The moment of truth had arrived.

Praise for Silent Warrior - Transformation

‘Raw, honest, authentic, and spellbinding… this truly is the heroine’s journey, as the author faces the biggest and most devastating challenge in her young life. It serves as a welcome reminder of how women diagnosed with premature menopause can navigate their lives to a place of gratitude and acceptance. How she has weaved her way through the minefields of her life to emerge transformed, should be an inspiration to both men and women alike, as courage and bravery are not bound by gender. If you need guidance and the wisdom of a bona fide, lion-hearted, warrior of the heart, then you will enjoy your emersion in this book, for it will reflect what lays within you.’

Rick Pursell – Author - Life Coach - TEDx Speaker

'Paula’s book found me on the precipice of falling into a hole of self-doubt or saying yes

to the rest of my life. It reassured me that we’re able to live life with as many chapters as we want, provided we keep choosing life and love. That our next big love, or next big life adventure is ready and waiting for us to claim it, regardless of how much life has hurt us, how old we think we are or how many times a great love has ended. I laughed, I cried, and I silently cheered her on, completely and utterly captivated by her strength, courage and heart.'

Naomi Holland - Author & Engineer

'An honest and captivating read, written with passion – I felt Paula’s heartfelt moments of frustration, glory, fears, enlightenments, heartbreaks, celebrations, and hunger for more adventures. It brings laughter, tears, and a sense of pride for a wonderful woman who has the courage to live an unconventional life and share this with us. Wow! What an inspiring journey!'

Donna Campisi – Speaker, Author, TEDx Speaker, and Podcaster

'I’m halfway through your book and I love it! It’s given me lots of food for thought about my own life and through reading it, I’ve come to acknowledge a lot of stuff that I have not processed in my life. It’s great! I feel empowered. I turn 50 tomorrow and I feel excited about the next decade. Thank you.


'I can’t put it down Paula!!! Blimmin awesome read!!! I keep having to get tissues though and my makeup is smudged!'

Heidi Jennings

'One of the things I love about being human is the inspiration I get from others. My big takeaway is the reminder to LIVE life! Not just being a life in a body, but experiencing life through our embodiment. Her journey is expressed in such a relatable way for all human beings. I'm ignited and bursting to EXPERIENCE LIFE! Thanks Paula!

Deb Hallem

'What a FANTASTIC read! Real, vulnerable, and honest. So many adventures in a lifetime... and I know that's not even the half of it!'

Catherine Storey

'I loved Paula’s book and feeling like I was going on the journey with her! Her descriptions of feelings, places, and experiences were powerful. It stirred up a lot of emotion in me, gave me food for thought, and also inspired me. I am in awe of Paula’s strength, courage and resilience to keep putting one foot in front of the other to move forward.'

Sonya Stephens

'Yippee I finished it, but now I want more... isn't that where a book should leave you?! When and where is the next one? Congratulations, I am most impressed – educational, inspirational, courageous, and in my modest view well written.  Loved that it has taken me through my own personal journeys of relationships, Reiki, and one of my favourite countries, Bali.  I admire and am envious that you have had your spirit guides taking a hand in your journey, positioning you to learn from, and proceed, one step to another. How lucky you are, but that is only apparent due to the hard work you have put in. Best definition of  'luck'  is... making the most of situations as presented to one. So well done!'

Pam Simons

Silent Warrior - Transformation

Paperback available for New Zealand and Australia direct from me

Paperback on Amazon

E-book on Amazon

Want to write your own book but don't know where to start?

After navigating my own journey, I can now help you. Head on over to my Merahki Publishing page to find out more.

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